In her online article entitled, Relationships: Eight Tips for Dealing With Criticism, author Gretchen Rubin shares some important steps on coping with criticism. The next time critics throw you “under the bus” try these steps…

Here are some of the strategies that I try to use to accept criticism. If I manage to use them, they never fail me, but it can be hard to have the mindfulness needed to apply them.

1. Listen to what a critic is saying. Really listen, try to understand that point of view, don’t just nod while you formulate your retorts.
2. Don’t be defensive. This is the toughest step for me. With my writing, for example, I always have to take a deep breath before reading an edit letter or meeting with an editor, to remind myself, “I welcome criticism. This person is helping me. I’m eager to hear how to improve my book/article/post.” Act the way you want to feel! That’s my Third Commandment. Along the same lines…
3. Don’t fire back by criticizing your critic. Your comments will just sound defensive, and you’ll escalate the exchange. This urge is very difficult to resist, because the impulse to justify and attack is strong when you feel criticized, but it just isn’t helpful, and it certainly isn’t effective.
4. Delay your reaction. Count to ten, take a deep breath, sleep on it, wait until the next day to send that email…any kind of delay is good. A friend told me that she has a rule for herself: when she’s upset about something that happened at her children’s school, she won’t let herself do anything about it for three days – and usually she decides that no action is better than action.
5. Explain honestly the reason for your actions. Sometimes it’s tempting to re-characterize your actual feelings and motives. Usually, though, that just complicates things more. It becomes impossible to have an honest exchange.
6. Admit your mistakes. This is extremely effective and disarming. When I got my first job, my father told me, “If you take the blame, you’ll get the responsibility.” I’ve found that to be very true. Difficult, but true. Admitting mistakes is the first step, then…
7. Explain what you’ve learned. If you can show a critic that you’ve learned something, you prove that you’ve understood the criticism and tried to act on it. That, itself, usually mollifies critics.
8. Enjoy the fun of failure. Re-frame the issue entirely to embrace criticism. Fact is, trying new things and aiming high opens you to criticism. I tell myself to "Enjoy the fun of failure to try to re-frame failure and criticism as part of the fun. Otherwise, my dread of criticism can paralyze me.”

What other strategies have you used to Cope With Criticism?

While reading Phil Cooke’s blog, I came across an article he wrote several months ago entitled, Life Change: Resolutions That Work, in which Phil talks about the resolutions we all make [and break] as we start the New Year. And, although we’re well into this new year, many of you are making resolutions right now that will impact your chances to reach your creative dreams. Here’s what Phil has to say:

“I'm reminded that every year we make New Year's resolutions, and every year we fail. We just can't seem to stay committed, enthusiastic, or determined enough to keep our good intentions. But the word "resolution" is simply another way to express the desire for change. And when you discover the secrets to real change, your resolutions will start to stick. Here are some tips:

1. There Can Be No Other Choice. Most New Year's resolutions fail because the stakes aren't high enough. When it's not important, we don't take our resolutions seriously. What do you need to change that's really "life or death" for you? An extra ten pounds might not be much to most people, but for a model, actress, or athlete, it could kill a career. Don't make a resolution unless it's really critical.
   
2. Change What Matters. Take control of your priorities, and you'll take control of your life. We often fail because we don't take the time to decide what's really important. A promotion has little value if it comes at the expense of your family. Stop spending so much time on what other people think is urgent, and spend more time on what really matters.
   
3. Eliminate Destructive Distractions. Release the negative baggage from your life. Stop re-living your last failure and start focusing on the future. The divorce, firing, bankruptcy, or other disaster in your past does not determine your future. As long as you dwell in the past, you'll never discover your destiny.
   
4. Finally, Build a Motivation Machine. Discover the difference cheerleaders can make. Long ago, athletes discovered the power of a cheering section. As you work through the most challenging aspects of personal change, you need people who believe and will encourage you. Get rid of the negative people in your life, and surround yourself with people who are convinced of your possibilities!”

Born in New York City, pitchman Ron Popeil is a multimillionaire. Over the past 40 years his products have grossed more than $1 billion in retail sales, and made him famous for: The Veg-O-Matic, Buttoneer, Smokeless Ashtray, Mr. Microphone, and The Pocket Fisherman, just to name just a few.

At 3 years old Ron’s parents divorced, sending he and his brother to boarding school in upstate New York. When he was 7, his grandparents brought the brothers down to Florida to live. At 16, Ron decided to move to Chicago to live with his father, Samuel J. Popeil, an inventor who sold his inventions to major stores like Sears and Woolworth’s.

Shortly after he arrived in Chicago, Samuel began to show his son how to persuade storeowners, managers, and buyers that customers wanted his gadgets. But Ron Popeil’s turning point came when he took a walk down Maxwell Street, a tourist attraction where vendors of every kind would sell their wares on the street.

Ron says, in his book, The Greatest Salesman of the Century, “I saw all these people selling product, pocketing money, making sales, and my mind went racing. I can do what they’re doing, I thought. But I can do it better than they can."

So, Ron gathered up some kitchen products from his father’s factory and went down on a Sunday to test out his salesmanship. Before long, he was stuffing money into his pockets from customers who pushed in to hear his “sales pitch." Suddenly, Ron realized that he didn’t have to be poor for the rest of his life, and could escape the miserable existence he had experienced up to this point.

When he wasn’t selling on Maxwell Street, he was demonstrating and selling his father’s products just inside the front door of Woolworth’s flagship store in downtown Chicago making $1000 a week. During the summer, he would work the state fair circuit, demonstrating his products in front of real people who asked silly questions. Ron quickly learned how to build answers and counter-arguments into his pitch.

By the mid-50’s Ron Popeil was at the top of his game. So he went to a television station in Tampa and produced a 60-second commercial for $500 for the Ronco Spray Gun, which ran on small stations in Illinois and Wisconsin to save shipping costs. His small investment quickly turned into a huge success, and opened the door for Ron to become one of the first people to make millions of dollars from advertising on television. By the early 60’s he was selling products exclusively over television.

So, what can you take away from the story of a poor kid from a broken home who found his calling creating products and selling them? Ron discovered how to:

1. Harness his ambition by working 10-hour days selling on the street.
2. Recognize the potential of each invention and gadget.
3. Find the right venue where he could turn customers into buyers.
4. Work to become competent explaining his products to his audience.
5. Listen to his customer’s concerns and solve those problems.
6. Refine his presentation until it became polished and affective.
7. Refuse to allow his history to affect his destiny.

Recently, I’ve enjoyed reading John Maxwell’s book, Talent is Not Enough. In it he shares some important principles, and makes this bold statement: “People simply will not pay for average. They never have, they never will.”

He goes on to elaborate: “What amazes me about America is we have fallen in love with being average. But what we need to wake up to is that being average has never caught anybody’s attention and made anybody go the extra mile.

Being average has never helped anyone rise above the crowd. Average is average.

But why are we so much in love with average? Think about it for a moment. After you come home from a hard day’s work, you don’t look at your significant other and say, “Honey, we’ve worked hard today so let’s treat ourselves and go out to an average restaurant. And when the hostess is about to seat you, you don’t say, “Oh, by the way we want an average table. Yes, the table overlooking the water is very beautiful but we’d really like a table where no one likes to sit. And last, could you send over an average waiter?”

And when the average waiter comes, you don’t say, “We don’t want to know what your specialties are. No, we don’t want to know what you’re good at. What’s average here? Do you have anything back in the kitchen nobody has ordered?” You don’t go to an average restaurant, sit at an average table, have an average waiter, have an average meal, and walk out of that average place and say, “Sweetheart, what an experience. We must do this again next week!”

People don’t pay for average. So what makes one think they can have an average business or an average career or an average life and make a difference? Average doesn’t make a difference. Average is average.”

As a creative driver the message is very clear: Stop being average and start doing anything and everything to be amazing. People will always pay for amazing!

“There is only a letter difference between change and chance. It got my attention as another small thing that often stops my creativeness, or the creativeness of others I know and work with.

Being creative produces change. Many to most people resist change or at least resist being changed. Being creative often requires that we take a chance or chances. Being creative requires that we venture into unknown territory and chance failure.

To be more creative we need to accept change and chance, and that with either the other will occur. If you change something you take a chance of potential failure. If you take a chance, change will normally be the result. Examine the changes your ideas will produce.”

To improve creativity, remember that:

1. Being creative produces change, and simple change produces creativity.
2. Creativity requires chance. Work at taking bigger chances.
3. Don’t react. Create.
4. Remind yourself, “I Can. I Can. I Can.”
5. Examine successful ideas, then adapt them vs. imitate them.
6. Change the metaphors in your life that are stopping you.
7. The solution lies within the problem. If you continue looking you’ll find the answer.
8. Look for small changes that will release and expand your creativity.

As a creative driver it’s time to make changes and take chances.

So, what does a producer do? Simply put, a producer serves as the “general contractor” who works with an army of talented “sub-contractors” to produce a project on budget, on time and to the satisfaction of the client.

Before I begin a project, I tell clients that my job is to serve as an “interpreter who translates their story in a compelling and effective way." My success - and the success of the project - rises or falls based on my ability to:

1. Share a vision for the project.
2. Hire a competent, creative crew.
3. Keep the job on schedule.
4. Watch the budget.
5. Show up on time every day.
6. Communicate with my client and my team.
7. Maintain professional standards.
8. Handle revisions and changes.
9. Bring the job in on time.
10. Give the client what he or she wants.

Although I can’t control last minute revisions to the project, I can control my ability to stay organized and tap into my years of experience to fulfill the vision, and get the job done.

But no matter what happens, “Never let them see you sweat!"

Human beings have an innate need to create. Even you! There is a continuum of creativity, ranging from being slightly creative to highly creative. The good news is that you can learn to be more creative by observing creative people and modeling yourself after them. Artists, writers, and creative types seem to have similar characteristics.

Some of the personality traits listed below may seem eccentric, odd, even "out there"--- but that is where creativity lies --- in the outreaches of our consciousness, in the depths of our souls. If you had the opportunity to speak to Picasso, Walt Disney, or Jane Austen, you would probably find out that they are ordinary people, much like you and I.

The difference is that they have allowed more of their soul to come out and play and have freed themselves of convention and restriction. Creativity is essentially the art of discovery and an act of faith.

When you create something --- a work of art, book, software program, dance routine, or role for a play, you discover parts of yourself that you never knew existed. Creative people have a strong need to express more of who you really are and often have to fight for that right. The character Isabelle in the movie, Fire and Ice, has a great outlook on what it means to be creative, she says, "To create, sometimes you must rebel."

1. Unconventional
   
   Creative people do not feel the need to conform to society's standards. They often swim against the current and flow with their own way of thinking and living. They have original ideas that literally turn the world upside down and right-side out. Take for example, the 16th century Italian astronomer, Galileo, who proved that the earth revolved around the sun (instead of the other way around), which was revolutionary in his time.
   
   
2. Individualistic
   
   Creative people want to find out what the truth is, and they have a strong need to decide for themselves what works and what does not. Often they are ahead of their time, and much of their work is appreciated/acknowledged after they are dead and gone. Many writers are famous for marching to the tune of their own drum, such as Ralph Waldo Emerson, who wrote the book, Self-Reliance, and Robert Frost who penned, "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less-traveled."
   
   
3. Inventive
   
   Creative people live in the world of ideas, and don't always have the best interpersonal skills. Because they are so highly intelligent, and live in the realm of possibility, they are constantly coming up with bright ideas. They also take notice of what is missing in the world and/or what could be improved. Take for instance, Thomas Edison, who invented hundreds of things in his time; his most famous invention being the light bulb. He saw that there was darkness and then created light.
   
   
4. Driven
   
   Creative people cannot "not do something"— they are almost compulsive until they can bring their internal vision into fruition. They have that "fire in their belly"--- a passion to contribute to the beauty and betterment of the world. Because of their high drive, they can produce a lot in a relative short amount of time. Talk about drive --- the material girl herself, Madonna, has not let public praise or criticism stop her from being a superstar. She is a modern day diva, multi-talented as a singer, dancer, and actress who has released hundreds of songs, albums, videos, movies, books --- all the while reinventing herself as someone new.
   
   
5. Visionary
   
   Creative people have a guiding vision in their head, heart, and soul that they are often called to bring to life. Who else but Michelangelo could look at a large piece of marble and "Chip away at everything that wasn't David?" According to him, "I saw an angel in the marble and carved until I set him free." One of his best-known works is the immense ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, which took him three years to complete, where he often had to work upside down for hours at a time. If you ever have seen any of his work, you can easily see that it is a vision to behold.
   
   
6. Intuitive
   
   Creative people are very in touch with their inner selves. They pay attention to the signs, synchronicities, symbols around them, and make use of that information in their work. They often act as a channel, where ideas and inspiration come from a higher plane. They allow the work to guide them to where it needs to go. The work clearly originates in their soul, not from their ego.
   
   Talk about ideas coming from out of the blue, remember how the scientist, Isaac Newton "discovered" gravity? He was sitting under a tree and an apple fell on his head! Had he not made a connection with his intuitive nature, he would have missed a major theory about the world we live in!

As you read this, do you find yourself relating to some of these traits? If so, it is time to start creating. Getting started can often be the hardest part, because we often limit our creativity by listening too closely to our negative inner voice. But so did all of these examples of creators. Even the famous painter Vincent Van Gogh struggled with that, but he created a remedy for that, he said, "If you hear a voice within you saying, you are not a painter, then by all means, paint, and that voice will be silenced."

Robert Henri says, "When the artist is alive in any person, whatever his kind of work may be, he becomes an inventive, searching, daring, self-expressing creature." Once you have created, you now have to put yourself out there for all to see. This is where your faith comes in to support you.

Remember that if you are creating from your soul, it will not matter whether other people accept your work or not. You are simply doing what you are called to do as a human being, create.

When you’re a freelance creative, adding value depends on your knowledge, skills, and talent alone. It’s easy to think that creative professionals should brand themselves. Before you choose that route, ask yourself these questions: Do you want to be the only resource for customers? Do you want to one day retire and earn passive income? Do you want your small business to grow?

In short, do you really want to create a personal branding prison for yourself?

Some people enjoy being “The Man” or “The Woman." They love the glory and fame of being a professional in demand. That’s perfectly fine, if the limitations and restrictions that result are acceptable consequences of self-branding. But let’s say you do want to leave the doors open for the future. Let’s say that you’re interested in having a way out of your business that doesn’t involve shutting down the shop for good. Let’s say the only asset to your business is your brain – what happens then?

Think Product, Not Service

Many creative professionals sell their services. They put all the focus on themselves, the very act of creation. That’s a mistake. It seals the perception that no one else can do what you can – and restricts the growth of your business. The best answer is to start transferring the focus away from you, the professional. Treat your services like products. Reduce the importance of you, the person accomplishing the task.

Start building the perception that the client receives something tangible when working with you. It doesn’t matter if the client can hold or touch what you created. The client did indeed receive something from you, even if it’s just a feeling that lingers. You are not your product. You are not your service. The client isn’t walking away with a slice of your brain. If you want to increase value in your business, stop heaping importance on your own shoulders. Start treating the result as more important than the act of creation.

Extending Faith

When you operate a business, you work hard on establishing a good, solid reputation. That’s what keeps clients coming back to you, right?  People already know that you provide something magnificent. They believe in you. They know you can give them what you want. They trust you.

When you extend your own trust and faith to another person, bringing them closer to your business, you transfer some of your customer’s trust to that person. Your clients have faith in you – they’ll have faith in your judgment and be more willing to accept someone else as your equal. Yes, you’re expanding your business. You’re growing. You’re no longer alone and your partner will work with you to maintain your established brand.

Guess what? You can take a vacation. You can step away. You can bring on more people and create a larger team. You can expand and branch into new services. You can retire. You have backup, a Plan B and an escape. You achieve freedom.

They drive to the participant's house, cook dinner, and surprise the woman's partner or guest upon their arrival. Preparing the meal requires Chef Stone to determine what ingredients he has to work with, plan a menu the client will enjoy eating, and be creative enough to change the recipe based on what he finds in the pantry.

Walking into a kitchen you’ve never seen, and cooking with food from someone else’s refrigerator or pantry is a challenge many chefs can’t handle. It requires the ability to take what you have and turn it into something hot and tasty.

So, what does it take to cook with what you have? To walk into an unknown environment and cook with what you have on hand?

Here are 7 Principles to help you do your best creative work.

1. Chefs always bring their own knives. Just like a master mechanic knows every screwdriver and wrench in his toolbox, the chef knows each knife in his bag. He has a working knowledge of what they can do and he knows when to use them. He keeps “his tools” sharp, protecting each knife from damage.
   
   In a creative world, we bring our own tools to every project. Those tools are the skills and abilities we use to be creative, plus the lessons we have learned from our mistakes. The successes we’ve had. And the people who have influenced us along the way.
   
   The ability to walk into an empty space, and transform it into something amazing by the end of the day, is a real test of creativity. Creative drivers see things that others may not see, and know how to use them to accomplish their vision.
   
   
2. Chefs know seasonings and flavors, and have developed a palate to recognize the right combination of flavors. A chef knows when flavors need to be understated and subtle, or bold and strong. By tasting the food as it’s prepared, chefs make the changes needed to create a dish to be remembered.
   
   Creative drivers know what to add or subtract to create from scratch. It’s not something that can be learned from a book, but something taught by experience. Ideas never seem to go in the direction they’re pointed. They take twists and turns, following different paths along the way. Learning how to make adjustments to get an idea back on course is an important part of being a creative professional.
   
   
3. Chefs understand proportions. They know exactly how much food they will need to feed a family or an army. A chef always prepares enough food to satisfy the client’s hunger.
   
   Knowing exactly what’s needed to bring an idea to life usually comes from experience, and the lessons learned from past success and past failure. Many times, failure is the better teacher because it requires more creativity to problem solve, and stay focused on the finish line. 
   
   
4. Chefs use imagination and creativity. They’re not afraid to try different combinations, and ideas. By learning to cook different styles of food, it gives him the flexibility to cook the right dish for the right occasion. He can see the finished dish and knows how it should taste - because he’s made it before.
   
   The ability to visualize is an important skill for creative drivers to possess – no matter what area you’re in. The ability to see before you create is an essential skill to have. If you can’t see the shot, hear the note, sketch the dress, or envision the finished book, then how will you know when you arrive at the end?
   
   
5. Chefs turn simple into elegant. He can cook from scratch, or add ingredients to make a prepared dish even better. He understands the importance of presentation and attention to detail. How can a chef cook with whatever is in kitchen?  Because he has memorized great recipes and knows how to evaluate ingredients.
   
   One of things I have to do as a director and editor is take video clips and arrange them in a compelling order to tell a story that motivates a viewer. Experience has taught me how to evaluate that material, and lay it out in a way that achieves that purpose.
   
   
6. Chefs know how to plan a great menu, and what role each course plays. He also knows what the family likes to eat by listening and asking questions. But most importantly, he doesn’t cook for himself, he cooks for his client. He doesn’t let his ego get in the way of pleasing his customer.
   
   A songwriter has the same scale of notes every musician in the world has to work with, but his creative ability to arrange those notes in the right order is the difference between a hit song, and just another unpublished idea. Knowing how to plan is an important step on the road to creative success.
   
   
7. Chefs plan for each course to be ready at the right time. A great chef knows the importance of timing, and how to keep each dish hot until it’s ready to be served. And because chefs can multi-task, they can prepare several dishes at the same time. There’s nothing worse than to prepare a great meal and serve it cold!